Inspired by Ben Steinâs âHow To Ruin Your Lifeâ, hereâs my top 10 about how to ruin your health:
10. Place your screen low: You heard me right, place it low. To think this has anything to do with your neck pain is juvenile. Placing your screen low will support many doctors and chiropractors for many years to come, and donât we all want to help the economy in tough times?
9. Do not stretch: Your neck/back pain has nothing to do with stretching. It is genetic!
8. Eat junk food: The faster you cook it the better. Who cares if it nutritional or not?
7. Eat in front of your computer, fast!: This one is pretty simple. Eat in front of the computer as it will take time away from searching for domains and optimizing your portfolio. Make sure to eat fast and not waste more then 60 seconds on a meal. Your body, unlike the rest of the world, will deal with it somehow.
6. Do not drink liquids often: Again, drinking liquids is for the weak. So you went 15 hours without drinking water, so what? Remember, you are a superhero!
5. Sit sloppy: Sitting straight in front of the computer is not something you want to do. When others say to you that you need to sit straight, they donât understand you are special, they donât understand your special DNA structure is unlike any other, they forget you are superior to all mankind.
4. Do not exercise, ever!: Unlike the rest of the world, YOU do not need to exercise. You work with your head and moving your eyes around the screen and the mouse cursor is more exercise then your body will ever need. Did I mention your future wife or current wife only cares about the money you make and not about physical attractiveness? Avoid at all costs!
3. Click more, faster: Repetitive Strain Injury cannot and will not affect YOU. You are superior to all mankind, your DNA is of a superhero.
2. Three hours of sleep is more then enough for you: Forget about anyone who says you need eight hours. Any minute more then three hours shows how weak you are. You are strong, you can handle three hours without trying. If anything, sleep two hours a day. No, it wonât affect your health, matter of fact, it will make your fingers stronger as you type domains more frequently.
1. Remember, anything that affects othersâ health can never affect yours. If anything, it will make you stronger. You are SPECIAL.
k:
