good lord, what's up with all the rudeness...

[paymaster7]

Hi,
Something I've been noticing for awhile in the domain world that really irks me is the amazing impoliteness of a number of buyers, brokers, sellers, etc.
It's a very odd phenomenom that i don't see much in my other businesses.
Where's common courtesy? Politeness, respect, and honesty are invaluable traits for any business in the world... but why is it that they aren't valued in the domain world?
I see so many people, there are obviously some particulars, who have an amazing ego about domaining. A few things in particular.

A) replying to directed PM's or posts to wanted ads is just common courtesy. if someone goes to the trouble of putting together a list of domains that exactly meet your criteria...shouldn't you at least show the respect of replying to hem? Even with a simple 'no, thanks'? I understand that a lot of PM's are off topic or just desperate...but it still seems to me that the 5 seconds you take to respond will ultimately benefit you if you want to look at it from a selfish standpoint... and jeez, is it so difficult to do that?

B) Some, not all by a long shot 'big name' sellers act like complete jerks. They seem to think they're superior to everyone and treat others like crap, really. It's to the point where they even push around moderators of forums they post in. I've seen moderators on several forums warn others not to crtiticize or question big name buyers BEFORE anyone does. What on Erath is that all about? It sends the message that they are valued much more than any other members - that the non 'big name' players are second rate citizens with no right to opinions. I imagine forums seek to encourage big name players to use their forums... and I understand that... it's just that they shouldn't be placed on a Gold Platter... it's just not fair and doesn't do much for a forum's reputation. I believe the negatives there exceed the positives for a forum anyways...

C) Favors are seldom met with any return... I feel so frustrated recently with the number of 'takers'... who never respond with good will or a return favor. More so in domaining than any other venture I've been involved with. It's just so counterproductive...

I guess all I'm hoping for is some common courtesy in the domaining world. It would greatly benefit everyone and reduce the ill will that permeates so many
threads... Just my thought.

Feel free to respond with any thoughts, comments. Cheers,
John

 

[JuniperPark]

Great post, John.

The majority of people here are VERY polite, and I've done a great deal of business with a large number of people here. But, it's the bad few that do stick in memory.

What's interesting that in at least one case, this particular broker has crossed the line he's BANNED from all other forums. Yet, if you post anything negative about him here, even to ask him to explain his actions, a moderator will admonish YOU. Clearly, something is going on there, and it's certainly not protecting people from further problems.

In another case, a a buyer was peddling a stolen domain name here, xi.com. Yet the person not only continues to be a member here, but I think was a MODERATOR.

Yet another case - a user failed to pay for a domain name purchased in the sale forum. Same user offered to 'help' another member in another country, so I warned the guy. My post was edited out by the moderator; the user remains unpunished and posts here daily.

This kind of stuff is the reason that I am beginning to transact most of my business elsewhere. When you refused to punish problem people, you no longer have a "community", you have.... well... eBay.

I'm sure I'm not the first to have to deal with these people, but it certainly makes me less friendly each time.

 

[paymaster7]

Note: I wasn't attacking this forum in my thread, it was a general domaining critique.

 

[JuniperPark]

Note: I wasn't attacking this forum in my thread, it was a general domaining critique.

Understood. But I think there is a reason why it happens here more than other places.

 

[Anthony Ng]

What's interesting that in at least one case, this particular broker has crossed the line he's BANNED from all other forums. Yet, if you post anything negative about him here, even to ask him to explain his actions, a moderator will admonish YOU. Clearly, something is going on there, and it's certainly not protecting people from further problems.

You can rest assured that I or any moderator here will be the last person to defend any rudeness here. My observation is exactly the opposite, and Rudeness itself has actually complained in public for being treated "unfairly" by our moderators. The truth is we have to see things as they are and not to oversimplify life as only black and white or good versus evil, AND NOT to play ghost buster. When challenging some questionable behavior, we may want to ask if we ourself are crossing the line of courtesy and fairness like thrashing a sales thread or posting "questions" irrelevant to the topic.

 

[JuniperPark]

You can rest assured that I or any moderator here will be the last person to defend any rudeness here. My observation is exactly the opposite, and Rudeness itself has actually complained in public for being treated "unfairly" by our moderators. The truth is we have to see things as they are and not to oversimplify life as only black and white or good versus evil, AND NOT to play ghost buster. When challenging some questionable behavior, we may want to ask if we ourself are crossing the line of courtesy and fairness like thrashing a sales thread or posting "questions" irrelevant to the topic.

Ok, I'll do that.

Is it "crossing the line of rudeness" to ask a broker, who is advertising services in a DISCUSSION forum why he's been banned in all other forums? NOPE.

Is it "crossing the line of rudeness" to note that a buyer has been actively selling a stolen domain name on this forum as he hunts here for more victims? NOPE.

Is it "crossing the line of rudeness" to tell a seller that a person bidding on a name he's selling has recently failed to make payment on anther transaction? NOPE.

Is it valid to ask why moderators here PROTECT members who have violated the terms of this board by editing and deleting posts? YES.

Any more questions?

 

[actnow]

Unfortunately, rudeness creates more rudeness.

And, mods do a good job trying to keep it "in check".

Since, you brought it up. I promise I will try to be more
pleasant.

John and Dale. All you need to do is step away.
And, order a dozen steamed crabs and a pitcher of
beer. And, all of your problems will go away.
(John, Dale grew up in O.C.).

 

[paymaster7]

lol, actnow, i'm right in baltimore, i'll grab some of those steamed crabs.

and this thread has gotten way too specific. both on part of mod and poster.

 

[David G]

....What's interesting that in at least one case, this particular broker has crossed the line he's BANNED from all other forums. Yet, if you post anything negative about him here, even to ask him to explain his actions, a moderator will admonish YOU. Clearly, something is going on there, and it's certainly not protecting people from further problems.....

In effect, you are casting shadows and negativity on innocent brokers and all the ones who left the other forums by saying that without naming who you refer to.....but of course, you are not doing that deliberately.

For example, I know of 3 or 4 so called 'brokers' who were either banned, suspended, or left under fire from the other forum with initials of DS. You may even be talking about a different broker outside of the ones I know about, who knows for sure.

So though I suspect I know (but not positive) I now wonder which one you refer to and a cloud of suspicion is on many of the name brokers as we are not positive who you are talking about.

 

[Mr Webname]

Problem is that in the "underworld" of the Internet it is so easy to make assumptions and pronounce persons guilty or innocent on a whim rather than on evidence. Let's consider some thoughts:-

1) A member here has been banned at another forum - should he be banned here just because of that, or should he only be banned here only if he does wrong here. Similarly do we believe that it is wrong to give someone a second chance?

2) A member defaults on a sale - should we shout in every thread about "our side of the story" or should we post in "Area 51", which is specifically provided to bring such matters to the notice of Mods and Admin, (or PM a Mod or Admin), and which will allow both sides of the issue to be weighed?

3) Is it wrong if Moderators take action when a member "goads" another into rudeness by making unwarranted posts or accusations in a public forum?

4) Is it polite/correct/harmless or rude/inflammatory/libelous to accuse Moderators of "protecting" wrongdoers?

Sometimes we need to think before we post and not use the anonymity of the Internet to allow us to behave in a manner that would be totally unacceptable elsewhere in life.

 

[paymaster7]

i don't see what any of this has to do with my original post. sounds like folks be getting all riled up at each other. take a nap or something.

 

[mole]

i don't see what any of this has to do with my original post. sounds like folks be getting all riled up at each other. take a nap or something.

Who are you to judge, oh master Obiwan Kenobi? Please post your credentials and your domain collection. You seem like a trouble maker with no sense of the domainer.

 

[actnow]

Paymaster, your intentions are good. And, I applaud your posting.

When, Paymaster stepped into the forum with fresh eyes. He was
taken back by some of the underlining tensions.

You were correct in your original posting.

It is unprofessional for us to make nasty remarks about others.

I have many years of business experience in another industry that was
ALOT more competitive than the domain industry. And, sometimes unethical
practices by my competitors (in that industry).

We all should treat each other with respect as a person.

Many things that are said on some forums that they would not say in person.

If you don't like me. Then, don't buy from me.

And, it is just as well. Because, who would want my grappy names anyway?

 

[NameTower]

why not bring back the warnings and praise forums

 

[mole]

Paymaster, your intentions are good. And, I applaud your posting.

When, Paymaster stepped into the forum with fresh eyes. He was
taken back by some of the underlining tensions.[/B]

Are you saying that the real world and jobs of the real world have no so-called "underlining tensions"? Is DNF a forum for real domainers or poofs who cry for mom at the slightest blow of the breath? If so, I recommend http://www.disneyland.com

Call me a cynic, but sure, rudeness is what you make and think of it. To splatter paint this community with barbed insinuations and paranoid delusions, you better be prepared to strut your credentials with confidence.

Studying master Obiwan Kenobi's semantics, reminds me of a spineless poof who was bullied as a child and has permanent emotional scars that is vented in forums, this just being one of a serial quest. Sorry, but if you can't take the tough conditions on the Internet, or worse, can't contribute but can only moan to this community. I would kindly advise that master Obiwan take a hike and go join the monestry of poofs, pardon the rudeness of course.

 

[actnow]

Studying master Obiwan Kenobi's semantics,

Mole, please excuse my ignorance, I don't know what you mean by the
above statement.

 

[mole]

I mean his language style, use of words and nuances, act?

 

[NameWolf]

This thread is the answer to your question. Mutual respect, understanding & kindness are two missing qualities in some of the members of this forum as well as a part of world's population...

 

[Anthony Ng]

I agree with actnow that this thread started off with a good intention talking about rudeness in a more general sense which shouldn't be hijacked away; and my earlier reply *might* have contributed partly to that. :embarrassed:

Yes, there have been some underlying tension going on. We should bear in mind that there are numerous interest groups within our membership, just like any other organization or the society as a whole; so very often we need to decode what people write and read between the lines as to WHY they say such things. This is SAD, but c'est la vie.

 

[impactadmin]

Reading through all your posts, I can see that we all have had some sort of experience with the issue at hand.

Rudeness overall is not what anyone likes. No matter what industry you deal with, it is always
well and alive. I would have to disagree that we only see it in the domain industry.
Its in every business and there really isnt an ultimate way of taming it.

Who holds the power to control others behaviours whether it is the brokers, sellers and or buyers?
Business is business and I think we can all agree that it is apart of the game.

I would have to say that the moderators have done quite a good job with respect to controlling the
issues with respect to rudeness. There is only so much you can do. Moderators understand the fact
that every decision they may or may not make, will have an impact on the forum and certainly
be criticized if it provides advantages or disadvantages to some.

The entire thread seems as if it is pointing fingers at someone else. The truth is none of us are completely
perfect and more than likely made a decision or behaved in a certain way that someone else did not like. It is
an issue that cannot be solved.

Pointing fingers does not do any good. We are here as a community to work together and achieve certain goals,
where it be to make money, learn about the industry, help each other out and so forth.

I agree with Nameslave where he posts "You can rest assured that I or any moderator here will
be the last person to defend any rudeness here"

I agree with Mr.Webname where he posts "Problem is that in the "underworld" of the Internet it is so easy to make
assumptions and pronounce persons guilty or innocent on a whim rather than on evidence. Let's consider some thoughts".

I also agree with JuniperPark when he says "The majority of people here are VERY polite, and I've done
a great deal of business with a large number of people here. But, it's the bad few that do stick in memory."

Depending on what the bad few have done or are responsible for should now be brought up in the new AREA 51 where moderators
can monitor certain users and make sure they are not deliberately undermining other members.

I also agree with "Actnow" that we should all be treated equal and to put it blunt, if you dont like me, dont deal with me.

Regards,
Huseyin