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How to turn a man down......

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>HE: Can I buy you a drink?
>SHE: Actually I'd rather have the money.

>HE: I'm a photographer. I've been looking for a face like yours .
>SHE: I'm a plastic surgeon. I've been looking for a face like yours.

>HE: Hi. Didn't we go on a date once? Or was it twice?
>SHE: Must have been once. I never make the same mistake twice.

>HE: How did you get to be so beautiful?
>SHE: I must have been given your share.

>HE: Will you go out with me this Saturday?
>SHE: Sorry. I'm having a headache this weekend.

>HE: Your face must turn a few heads.
>SHE: And your face must turn a few stomachs.

>HE: Go on, don't be shy. Ask me out.
>SHE: Okay, get out.

>HE: I think I could make you very happy.
>SHE: Why? Are you leaving?

>HE: What would you say if I asked you to marry me?
>SHE: Nothing. I can't talk and laugh at the same time.

>HE: Can I have your name?
>SHE: Why? Don't you already have one?

>HE: Shall we go see a movie?
>SHE: I've already seen it.

>HE: Where have you been all my life?
>SHE: Hiding from you.

>HE: Haven't I seen you some place before?
>SHE: Yes. That's why I don't go there anymore.

>HE: Is this seat empty?
>SHE: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.

>HE: So, what do you do for a living?
>SHE: I'm a female impersonator.

>HE: Hey baby, what's your sign?
>SHE: Do not enter.

>HE: Your body is like a temple.
>SHE: Sorry, there are no services today.

>HE: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
>SHE: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing

>HE: Where have you been all my life?
>SHE: Where I'll be the rest of your life - in your wildest dreams.
 
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snicksnack

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enjoy it very much!

thanks.
 

Edder

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How many souls have you tortured with these lines? :)
 

Mr. Pim

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Here are some more pick up lines for you Fearless ;)

Am I dead, Angel? Cause this must be heaven!

Apart from being sexy, what do you do for a living?

Baicarumba...are those real?

Be unique and different, just say yes.

Can I flirt with you?

Damn girl, you have more curves than a race track.

Do you know karate? Cos damn it honey, your body is really kickin.

Excuse me. I'm from the FBI, the Fine Body Investigators, and I'm going to have to ask you to assume the position.

Gee, that's a nice set of legs, what time do they open?

Greetings and salivations

Honey, I'm new in this town - dya think I could have directions to your house.

I hope you know CPR, cos you take my breath away!

I've got the ship, you've got the harbor ... what say we tie up for the night?

I've just moved you to the top of my 'to do' list.

If you don't wanna have kids with me, then why don't we just practice?

Screw me if I am wrong, but haven't we met before?

That outfit would look great in a crumpled heap next to my bed.

Were you arrested earlier? It's gotta be illegal to look that good.
 

simon

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I didnt know Sue loved cracking jokes....
Pimp i liked yours too

LOL
 

JMJ

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From my old site. May be a repeat or two

He said, "Shall we dance?"
She said, "No thank you."
He said, "Don't thank me, thank god that someone asked you."


He said, "I know how to please a woman.."
She said, "Then please leave me alone."

He said, "I want to give myself to you."
She said, " I don't accept cheap gifts."

He said, "You look like a dream"
She said, "Then go back to sleep."

He said, "Hey baby, whats your sign?"
She said, "Do Not Enter"

He said, "I can tell you want me."
She said, "Yes, I want you to leave."

He said, "I'll go through anything for you."
She said, "Lets start with the bank account."

He said, "I'd go to the end of the earth for you."
She said, "Yes, but would you stay there?"

He said, "Your place or mine?"
She said, "Both, you go to yours and I'll go to mine."

He said, "Your body is like a temple."
She said, "Sorry, no service's today."

He said, "Whats it like being the most beautiful woman in the bar?"
She said, "Whats it like being the biggest liar in the world?"

He said, "Have I seen you someplace before?"
She said, "Yes, thats why I don't go there any more."

He said, "If I could see you naked I'd die happy."
She said, "If I could see you naked, I'd die laughing."

He said, "Haven't I seen you some where before?"
She said, " Yes I work at the VD clinic."

He said, "Is this seat empty?"
She said, "Yes, and this one will be too if you sit there."

He said, "So do you wanna go back to my place?"
She said, "I don't know, can two people fit under a rock?"

He said, "So what do you do for a living."
She said, "I'm a Female Impersonator."

He said, "Hey we're both here for the same reason."
SHe said, " Yeah, lets pickup some chicks!"

He said, "I'd like to call you whats your number?"
She said, "It's in the phone book."
He said, "But, I don't know you're name."
She said, "Thats in the phone book too."

He said, "I'm here to fulfill your every sexual fantasy."
She said, "You have the horse and the great dane?"


He said, "I'd really like to get in your pants."
She said, "No thanks, Theres already one ass in there."

He said, "_____"
She said, "I like your approach, now lets see your departure."

He said, "Where have you been all my life?"
She said, "Hiding from you"

He said, "Can I have your number?"
She said, "555-hellno"
 

khuldun

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Really nice ones, have to be careful with women ;)
 

csitenet

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oh, the number of times i heard that on a Saturday night when i was at university.... This is bringing back bad memories…

>HE: Where have you been all my life?
>SHE: Where I'll be the rest of your life - in your wildest dreams.
 

deerfern

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Really fUnny! Thanks to you all !
 
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