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Level 5
- Joined
- Apr 17, 2003
- Messages
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For the ladies....
- Where do you have to go to find a man who is truly into commitment? - A mental hospital!!
- How many men to change a light bulb? Two, one to change the bulb and one to collect the medal.
- When woman makes a fool of a man it's usually an improvement
Q. Why have men made such a mess of this world?
A. They're waiting for women to pick up after them.
Q. What do you call a man who's lost 95% of his brain?
A. A widower.
- There is no great men. There are only men.
K, for all you men out there, don't feel left out, here you go:
- How many women does it take to change a lightbulb? - None, they just sit in the dark and moan!
- Why do women have small feet? - So they can get closer to the sink!
- If your wife and a lawyer were drowning and you had to choose...
lunch or a movie?
- How many men does it take to change a lightbulb? - None, let her do the dishes in the dark.
Q: Why are hurricanes normally named after women?
A: When they come they're wild and wet, but when they go they take your house and car with them.
Q. Why do women have breasts?
A. So men will talk to them.
Q. Why do women close their eyes during sex?
A. They can't stand to see a man have a good time.
Q: What's worse than a male chauvinistic pig?
A: A women who won't do what she's told.
Q: How can you tell if your wife is dead?
A: The sex is the same but the dishes pile up.
Q: How many men does it take to open a beer?
A: None. It should be opened by the time she brings it.
The Ages Of Women
1. Between the ages of 16 and 18, she is like Africa, virgin and unexplored.
2. Between the ages of 19 and 35, she is like Asia, hot and exotic.
3. Between the ages of 36 and 45, she is like America, fully explored, breathtakingly beautiful, and free with her resources.
4. Between the ages of 46 and 56, she is like Europe, exhausted but still has points of interest.
5. After 56 she is like Australia, everybody knows it's down there but who gives a damn? (sorry to all the Aussies on the forum)
- Where do you have to go to find a man who is truly into commitment? - A mental hospital!!
- How many men to change a light bulb? Two, one to change the bulb and one to collect the medal.
- When woman makes a fool of a man it's usually an improvement
Q. Why have men made such a mess of this world?
A. They're waiting for women to pick up after them.
Q. What do you call a man who's lost 95% of his brain?
A. A widower.
- There is no great men. There are only men.
K, for all you men out there, don't feel left out, here you go:
- How many women does it take to change a lightbulb? - None, they just sit in the dark and moan!
- Why do women have small feet? - So they can get closer to the sink!
- If your wife and a lawyer were drowning and you had to choose...
lunch or a movie?
- How many men does it take to change a lightbulb? - None, let her do the dishes in the dark.
Q: Why are hurricanes normally named after women?
A: When they come they're wild and wet, but when they go they take your house and car with them.
Q. Why do women have breasts?
A. So men will talk to them.
Q. Why do women close their eyes during sex?
A. They can't stand to see a man have a good time.
Q: What's worse than a male chauvinistic pig?
A: A women who won't do what she's told.
Q: How can you tell if your wife is dead?
A: The sex is the same but the dishes pile up.
Q: How many men does it take to open a beer?
A: None. It should be opened by the time she brings it.
The Ages Of Women
1. Between the ages of 16 and 18, she is like Africa, virgin and unexplored.
2. Between the ages of 19 and 35, she is like Asia, hot and exotic.
3. Between the ages of 36 and 45, she is like America, fully explored, breathtakingly beautiful, and free with her resources.
4. Between the ages of 46 and 56, she is like Europe, exhausted but still has points of interest.
5. After 56 she is like Australia, everybody knows it's down there but who gives a damn? (sorry to all the Aussies on the forum)
