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## The Rules ##

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Johnn

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* The female always makes the rules.
* The rules are subject to change at any time without prior notification.
* No male can possibly know all the rules.
* If the female suspects the male knows all the rules, she must immediately change some or all the rules.
* The female is never wrong.
* If the female is wrong, it is because of a flagrant misunderstanding which was a direct result of something the male did or said wrong.
* If the previous Rule applies, the male must apologize immediately for causing the misunderstanding.
* The female can change her mind at any given point in time for any reason.
* The male must never change his mind without express written consent from the female.
* The female has every right to be angry or upset at any time.
* The male must remain calm at all times, unless the female wants him to be angry or upset.
* The female must not, under any circumstances, let the male know whether or not she wants him to be angry or upset.
* Any attempt by the male to document these rules could result in severe bodily harm.
* If the female has PMS, all rules are null and void
 

Bionic

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THE 3 LAWS OF FEMONICS

1 A male can never through action or inaction allow a female to be unsatisfied
2 A male will always do exactly what a female says unless this contradicts the first law
3 A male will keep well groomed at all times unless this contradicts the first or second laws
 
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